Time is Moving Weirdly. Or is it just me?

A serene beach with the shade of a palm tree.

I’ve been home with my partner since March 13, except for a very anxiety-riddled visit to the vet (no contact delivery and pick up of my pooches) and a quick stop at Dairy Queen (we were RIGHT THERE. Don’t judge me.) For the first month, I was in a fog. Panicked all the time. Unable to sleep or eat. Obsessive. Hypochondriacal.

Thankfully, it did eventually end. Then I became focused on being productive. WRITE. CLEAN. ORGANIZE. Work on the yard. Get arts and crafty. There are days that I am very productive.

There are also days when I get up, have a cup of coffee, glance at the clock—and it’s 3:30PM. Then suddenly it’s 9:00PM. Then 11:00PM. What the hell?

I have a few guesses about what happens. Sometimes, it’s a social media time suck. Sometimes it’s a Netflix binge. Or more likely, my to-do list is SO BIG I wander around my house unsure of where or how to start.

The consequence is that I accomplish nothing on those days. Zilch. In fact, it’s all I can do to drag my exhausted for no reason self to bed. Fortunately, I found a fix for it. I pick ONE thing that I MUST accomplish each day, instead of my usual multi-item list. I nearly always do more, but when I don’t, I can still look back on the day and feel good about it.

Does this weird passing of time ever happen to you? How do you deal with it?

By the way, this beautiful picture here has nothing to do with what I’m writing about today. It just makes me happy. I hope it makes you happy, too.

It's Okay. It is.

A cup of tea…and a moment of peace.

There are so many unimaginable things going on around us today. It is difficult to take it all in, let alone focus on it for extended periods of time. It saddens me to know that several of my friends feel guilty about not being able to watch the news all day, or go to every rally, or even stay on FaceBook and chat with their friends about world events.

But it’s okay. It really is. You don’t have to overload yourself with news to the point of hopelessness or stress. You DESERVE to binge-watch Cloak & Dagger and lose yourself in their quest. You are WORTHY of the respite that comes from taking a long walk, or sitting in nature watching the birds. And you are entitled to give your self a break, make a cup of tea (or the beverage of your choice) and escape inside a book.

So take a step back from the insanity and find a few new reads. Here are some free (or pretty cheap). Just click on the picture.

Be well.

Myth and Magic, Free EBooks for Fantasy Lovers

Sexy Short Reads, EBooks $4.99 and Below

Welcome to My World, free fantasy and SciFi EBooks

Pineapple Fried Rice

Sometimes you just have to go for it.

I’ve been craving Asian food since just before the lockdown, I mean, quarantine. So tonight I took the plunge to make some.

Mind you, any other time I’ve tried to make Asian food it came out HORRIBLY. I just could never replicate the taste of my favorites. Egg Foo Young. Lo Mein. Korean Barbecue. Tempura anything. So today I was looking up recipes (#foodporn) and I didn’t have the ingredients for any of them.

But I was determined. So I combined a couple of different recipes and made a leap of faith in my improv cooking skills. Mom was, after all, a caterer.

Here is the result—Pineapple Fried Rice and Tempura Shrimp. OMG, it was delicious. I used these ingredients:

• jasmine rice

• onion

• whole salted cashews

• raisins

• frozen pineapple

• soy sauce

• curry powder

• eggs

I am so excited. My mom would be proud of me.

Tho I did cheat with the shrimp. I had some frozen, already tempura’d shrimp in the freezer.😊

Next on the agenda: Homemade Eggrolls

Taking Care of Ourselves

We’re all talking about the effects of isolation on our mental health.  One of the suggestions experts are making is to start a journal.  The theory seems to be that this is such an unusual time and circumstance we would value a record in the future.  That sounds like a wonderful idea.  I wish I had been able to do that.

But the pandemic and social isolation/social distancing have had the opposite effect on me. I’ve kept a journal for most of my life.  During stressful times in the past, I have written up to 10 pages a day dealing with the circumstance.  Journaling this spring should have been easy.  I am, after all, a writer.

Since early March, it has been difficult for me to “orient to time”.  I do clearly understand day-to-day events but often not the exact date. Time compresses, too. I often can’t remember if something happened last week or the week before. My sleeping has become erratic as well. At least twice a week I find myself still awake at 5 am, with the sun peaking over the horizon

Yesterday, I picked up my journal because I thought it had been a few days since I had written.  The last entry was April 3rd. My new plan is to follow Julia Cameron’s recommendation for Morning Pages. This means writing for three pages, longhand, in the style of stream of consciousness. The idea is to do this first thing in the morning to have a clear mind for the day.  

I don't want to. But I will. It will help me keep track of time. It will also enable me to discharge some of my anxiety on the page.

I also found a few things that really help me to reign in my uneasiness. Besides writing, I find deep breathing to be helpful. The Calm app is for iOS devices is a goto for me, There are options that you can get if you pay for them, but the breathing exercises are free (so far) and they really help. Calm Of course, the master of breathing exercises is Dr. Andrew Weil. You can find his exercises here: Dr.Weil

If that sounds too boring to you, many places are offering virtual tours. I find it pretty meditative to watch an aquarium, or meander through a museum. Here are a couple of links to explore. YOu might find something to take you away from your worries, if only for a little while.

Best Virtual Tours According to Goodhousekeeping

Best Virtual Tours According to Town and Country Magazine

How are you managing? Be well. Stay safe. #stayhome if you can #washyourhands

Legacies and Outer Banks: The Good, the Bad, and the Ridiculous 4/5 Stars

This week I’m offering a twofer. I recently finished watching two series.

The first binge-worthy show was Legacies (two seasons), which is a sequel to both Vampire Diaries and The Originals. It features characters from both shows with a focus on their children.

I have to admit, I watched Season 1 and 2. After the first season I was hooked. The characters were quirky and interesting, the plot moved along quickly and drew me right into the story. I found myself really caring about the kids and feeling their joy and pain as it unfolded. The second season started off similarly.

Slowly, I started to notice that threads were being left untied. One of the main characters turned into a villain (for which the groundwork had been nicely laid), but very quickly became a bit of a caricature, complete with a new hairstyle, goth clothing, and dramatic make-up. Oh, and she gained the ability to fly. The story lost me for a few episodes. However, I’m glad I stuck with it, as it redeemed itself and wrapped up nicely at the end. The good guys prevailed.

Outer Banks is also a show about an ensemble of high schoolers. I found myself recognizing all of them from my youth—The poor hero, a good guy who is making the most of a challenging life. The bad boy with an abusive father but with a heart of gold. The newly rich girl who struggles to fit in and the uber rich girl who falls for the poor good guy. A star-crossed trope for sure, with some of the worst and corniest dialogue I’ve ever heard. Many of the secondary characters are stereotypes and are overacted. BUT…I could not stop watching.

Each of the teenagers in the main cast is engaging and likable. The story pulled me in from the start and I stayed along for the ride, rooting (occasionally aloud) for them to succeed in their quest. And the view—I may have been destined to love this show because the scenery was everything I love the ocean waves and the beach.

There you have it. Both shows receive a 4 out of 5 star rating from me. Imperfect, yes. Engaging, yes. An absolutely fun.

The New Binge #stayhomesavelives

As I mentioned last week, I’ve been isolating due to the pandemic. I’ve finished ALL the baking series. I’ve finished all the supernatural series that seem worth watching. I’ve seen all the comedy specials that looked hilarious. So now what?

Yay! Webinars!

Webinars

I know, right? But today alone I’ve watched several. One on writing, one on marketing, another on relationships, and still another on COVID-19. (That one was particularly informative.)

Given that many of us are isolating at home, companies are showcasing their wares through offering free opportunities to learn something, see something, or do something. Occasionally there’s a sales pitch involved but not always. And there is something for everyone.

I admit I often learn about them from a newsletter I subscribe to. But you can easily find them. A quick google search found a host of opportunities.

webinars for writers

webinars for librarians

webinars for artists

webinars for librarians

webinars for gardening

It’s a simple google search “Webinars for—” whatever. Try it and see. Oh—here’s a list of several about Earth Day. You’re welcome.

Webinars about/for Earth Day

I Bake, and I Blame Netflix

SCONES!

The Great British Baking Show. The Great British Baking Show Holidays. Sugar Rush. Sugar Rush Christmas. Zumbos Just Desserts.

I’ve watched every episode that Netflix has. Hour after hour of mostly delicious looking bread, cake, pastries, tarts, cookies, donuts, trifles. It was like a gateway binge, because it led me to Food Network.

Buddy vs Duff. Chopped: Sweets. Spring Baking Championship. Holiday Baking Championship. Kids Baking Championship.

I have never been a baker. Way too much science for me. Don’t get me wrong. I cook. My mom was a caterer so I learned from the best. I have an extensive repertoire that continues to grow. But baking? I’ve tried it. In the past I’ve made rolls and pies from scratch. Once, I recall, I even made a soufflé or two. But aside from the occasional batch of cookies, I hadn’t baked in years.

Until now.

Come on! Seeing all those yummy treats day after day made me crave them. Now that we’re in the apocalypse, I mean, the mandatory stay at home orders, if I wanted any I had to make them myself. Damn it.

Besides Cookies Galore, I’ve made biscuits, banana bread, cranberry orange bread, and waffles (from scratch). My next attempt will be scones. I can’t decide what kind—I have the ingredients for cranberry, cinnamon, lemon-cranberry, maple oat nut, and raisin. What should I make?

After I master scones, I’m off to the big time-I’m going to make bread—if I can find some yeast. Or maybe I’ll make my own. Damn you, Netflix!

Cover Design: It’s My Story

Mad respect to those talented people who have an artistic sensibility and a grasp of design concepts. It seems to be a complex amalgamation of concepts that leads to something visually appealing and effective.

Photo credit to Deposit Photos

I’ve recently thought about what I want the cover of my soon to be released books to look like. No matter who ultimately I ask to design them, I’m going to need to be able to tell them what I’m looking for.

Apparently, all genres have a specific set of expectations when it comes to covers. My books are all Urban Fantasies. Covers are expected to be dark and contain a representation of the protagonist.. The character should be somewhat front and center, and there should be mystical or magical elements. Many covers use the magical elements to frame the character’s image.

Some people argue that rules are meant to be broken. Operating outside of the status quo might get some attention. The other perspective, however, is that readers won’t even notice your book if they don’t recognize the genre.

What do you think?

Staying Home is the Greater Part of Valor: What are you doing with YOUR time?

Hi there. How’s your new normal going?

Cup of coffee sitting by a laptop. Credit: DepositPhotos

Much respect to the teachers who are battling it out, trying to teach online when many have never done so. Make no mistake, teaching an online class well is harder than teaching an on-ground class. Of course, if you aren’t diligent or don’t care, it could be a breeze, I suppose. But dedicated teachers want their students to learn, and want to bring them a little bit of normalcy in this difficult time.

As for me, I am staying at home as much as possible—the exceptions being going to the grocery store and the pharmacy. I’m in a high risk group, and so are people I love, so staying in is the better part of valor..

Always a bit of a loner, I’m surprisingly okay with this. I’m teaching myself how to use a graphic design program. I’m taking an online course in publishing. I’m coloring. Lots of coloring. (It’s a pretty addictive app.) I’m binge-watching Netflix and Amazon Prime offerings, like the Great British Baking Show, Black Lightening, Happy (LOVE Christopher Meloni), comedy specials, and a couple of really bad horror movies. Like Revenge of the Were Rooster.

Yeah. Don’t ask.

Then there are house projects. I reorganized my office and rearranged my living room. I’m also writing. In fact, April is Camp Nano, where I pledge to write at least 20,000 words this month.

But enough about me. If you are a first responder, medical personnel, nonprofit employees, or you work in a drug store or grocery or restaurant or deli…THANK YOU. One lesson many are learning and that I’ve always known is that YOU are the backbone of our society. Not the corporations, not the government. You. You have my unending gratitude.

How is everyone else doing? I’d love to hear how you’re spending the time. If you have a Netflix recommendation, I’d love to hear that too.

Be safe. Be well.

Hope and Cabin Fever

These are terrible times. We are seeing humanity at its dumbest (stay home, people!) and its cruelest (hoarding without regard for others). Our leaders are failing us and increasing the risk to our lives by putting corporate greed over the health and safety of their constituents. 

Yet, some businesses are taking it upon themselves to make sure their workers have sick leave pay. Stores are saving special times for their most vulnerable populations to shop. Our doctors and nurses and researchers are working around the clock to keep up with the carnage. Without the proper equipment, they do this at risk to themselves. Our restaurant, grocery store and pharmacy employees, never before recognized for how critical they are, are still going to work, every day, so we can find a way to carry on. 

This gives me hope.

Like you, I’m home, quietly doing all I can by staying home. This is no sacrifice; it is my responsibility. It is THE responsibility of the rest of us. The only other thing I can do, I do happily–Free books.

Just click on the picture for the opportunity to collect a bunch of stories offered for free. If you’re like me, the distraction will be welcome. 

#stayhomesavelives #washyourhands

A picture of spring flowers, with the words, Spring into Love.

A Sad Goodbye to My Darling Chloe

I am so sorry to have been away so long. It has been an unusual and stressful month—as I imagine you all have experienced. Mine started in early March. About two weeks before the world changed, my 16 year old puppy died. My Chloe.

One day, she began to cough and couldn’t stop. She also was having trouble catching her breath. A two day ordeal at the veterinary ER then hospital revealed she had developed pulmonary hypertension. She was unable to get enough oxygen into her body. They treated her with medication, put her in an oxygen filled kennel, and kept her comfortable. The prognosis early on was good. Since they’d figured out what was wrong, they knew how to treat it.

After a couple of days in the hospital, it was clear she wasn’t responding to the treatment. She continued to need oxygen. Just a few moments out of the enriched air she struggled to breathe. And she looked so tired. My usual feisty baby girl barely responded to my voice or my touch. The vet sadly told us that at this point, given her lack of response to the medication, Chloe would get much worse, suffering terribly. We made the only decision left to make.

It was horrible. I still can’t think of those moments without crying.

Chloe, claiming the box.

Chloe, headed somewhere.

She loved riding in the car.

Chloe in her element

The stinkier the smell, the better. Plus, itchy.

Food, glorious food.

Chloe looking for Toby’s leftovers.

The Siblings

Chloe, here with her little sister Molly and little brother Toby. There was no doubt who ruled the roost.

After this sad ordeal, there was barely time to grieve before the rest of the world turned on its head. But I’ll write more about that another day. In the meantime, remember your pets cannot transmit the COVID-19, #washyourhands, and #staysafe.

Kiss? Yeah.

Do you remember your first kiss?

For some reason, the recent holiday, Valentine’s Day, brought to mind my first kiss. Actually, I consider that I’ve had two, but more about that in a minute. 

My first kiss took place in a movie theater. It was Christmas day, and I was 13 years old. My family had invited their best friends—my godparents—to our home to celebrate with us, and they brought Daewon with them. He was an exchange student living with them at the time. Daewon was older than me—16. Whew.

I’d never met anyone like him before. He had the curliest and longest long blond hair I’d ever seen on a boy. Moreover, he spoke with an Israeli accent, which was so exotic and sexy to me. 

After spending the afternoon with him, my older brother, his wife, and my sister decided we should all go to the movies. To my surprise and excitement, my new friend came too.

My sister’s boyfriend met us at the theater. They sat with my brother and sister-in-law in the back rows, leaving me and Daewon alone in a more crowded mid-row. I think they thought I’d be safe in the middle of the crowd.

Here it gets a little fuzzy. We talked softly to each other during the movie, and at some point, he gave me a peck on the cheek. And then he kissed me. Really kissed me, like, a full-on, grown up kiss.

I think I levitated. A chorus of angels sang.

We continued to kiss all the way through the rest of the movie. I think that first kiss changed my life. I don’t know how, but I think I would be a different person if Daewon hadn’t kissed me.

Of course, after that I kissed a number of people as I navigated my teen years. Don’t get me wrong. I wasn’t a kiss-aholic. Let’s see. I think I kissed 4 more people, including the person I would be with for the next 20 years. 

And then, after kissing all the wrong people, I had my last, first kiss with my soulmate. My forever love. Long-distance friends for years prior, we danced around the issue of attraction for a long time. Not that we talked about it. But one day, we both suddenly realized maybe we were meant to be more than friends. 

The moment we saw each other again, we kissed. A full-on, grown up kiss. 

It felt like home. And that kiss, it absolutely changed my life. I am a different, better person than I was before.

Your turn. Tell me about your first kiss.