I worry about everything.
The election. My partner’s asthma. My weight. Upcoming doctor appointments. COVID-19. World peace. My dog’s incessant appetite and thirst. Carbohydrates. The condition of the sun. Death. (Just as a few examples.)
It is exhausting, really. It takes its toll. Sleep becomes elusive, because when I close my eyes, all I can do is think about the thing I’m worrying about. And poor coping skills lead me to eat badly and stop exercising. Moreover, I also get nauseated, sometimes with the existential nausea of questioning existence.
One day, in the middle of worrying about death and dying, I had a conversation with a friend. She calmly listened to me lament while my stomach churned. At a point, she looked at me with the most puzzled expression and asked me, “If there is nothing you can do about it, why spend the time worrying?”
She went on to point out to me that the time I spent worrying so hard ruins time—worrying so much about death wastes life.
Have you ever had a lightbulb moment, a moment when you understand something so profound it changes your life? That was mine.
I’m not saying I never worry. I do. I suppose it’s in my nature. But a lot of the time, when I remind myself about this conversation. What’s the point of worrying when there is nothing I can do? And since EVERY minute of life is so precious, why waste any of them feeling sick and agitated about something that is out of my control? After that, I can usually take a breath and let it go.
Mostly.
I’d love to hear about your lightbulb moments. What “aha!” changed your life.
My lesson in a chart.
